What do women and milk cartons have in common?
You gotta open the flaps to get to the good stuff.
I've got a new hobby -- collecting empty bottles.
Sounds a lot better than "I'm an alcoholic."
What do you say to a woman who won't suck your dick?
"Honey, I'm home."
Wife asks her spouse: "What are you doing?" Her husband says: "Nothing." So she presses him: "Nothing...? You've been reading our marriage certificate for the last hour."
He tells her: "Well... yeah... I was looking for the expiration date."
And that's when the fight started...
