What do you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?
Slow down and use some lubricant.
The difference between buying a lottery ticket and fighting with your wife?
You have a chance at winning the lottery.
I asked my wife: "Where do you want to go for our anniversary, honey?"
It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation.
"Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said.
So I suggested: "How about the kitchen?"
And that's when the fight started...
You know why every woman doesn't go to heaven?
If they all went, it would be hell.
