For their 10th anniversary, a wife surprises her husband by wearing the lingerie she wore on their wedding night. She asks him what his exact thoughts were 10 years ago when he first saw her in the lingerie.
He tells her, "I wanted to suck your tits dry and fuck your brains out." "Well, what do you think today?" she asks,
A group of Americans were traveling by tour bus through Switzerland. As they stopped at a cheese farm, a young guide led them through the process of cheese making, explaining that goat's milk was used.
She showed the group a lovely hillside where many goats were grazing. "These," she explained, "are the older goats put out to pasture when they no longer produce."
She then asked, "What do you do in America with your old goats?"
A spry old gentleman answered, "They send us on bus tours!"
The receptionist calls the doctor into the waiting room in a panic: "Doctor, the patient you just treated died on his way out the door. What should I do?"
The doctor says, "Turn him around so it looks like he died on the way in."
