Why'd the bride slide down the bannister on her honeymoon?
To warm up her husband's dinner.
What'd the hockey player get on his SAT's?
Drool.
A guy takes his date back to her place. He gets her up to her bedroom where he sees a wall full of fluffy toys.
After he fucks her he asks her: "How was I?"
She says: "Take anything from the bottom shelf."
Guy gets home from work on the day the stock market tumbled looking visibly upset. His wife asks: "Honey, what's the matter?"
He tells her: "I can't believe I lost half my money and I still have you."
And that's when the fight started...
