If you force a prostitute to screw you, is it rape or shoplifting?
You choose.
Why is being in the military like a blowjob?
The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel.
If a guy and a girl need a marriage license what do lesbians need?
A liquor license.
A guy says to his friend, “I haven’t spoken to my wife in 18 months.”
The friend asks, “Why not?”
The guy tells him, “I don’t like to interrupt her.”
