Why do men like women with small hands?
It makes their dicks look bigger.
Why were the two whores travelling in London pissed off?
Because they found out that Big Ben was a clock!
The angry wife met her husband at the door. There was alcohol on his breath and lipstick on his collar. "I assume," she snarled, "that there is a very good reason for you to come waltzing in here at five o'clock in the morning?"
"There is," he replied. "Breakfast."
And that's when the fight started...
How do you know if your wife's dead?
You stick your dick in her mouth and she doesn't turn her head.
