Why do blondes like to drive cars with a sunroof?
More leg room.
What do you call a guy with a small dick?
Justin!
What do you call a guy with a giant dick?
Phil!
An old couple sits down to breakfast on their Fiftieth Anniversary stark naked.
The wife says "Oh, Harold, this is just like fifty years ago...my breasts feel all warm and tingly..."
He says, "They ought to be, Gladys...one's hanging in your oatmeal and the other is in your coffee."
My wife smiled at breakfast this morning and said: "Today is our anniversary darling... what should we do?"
I told her: "Stand in silence for 2 minutes."
And that;s when the fight started...