What do you call a black man who flies a plane?
A pilot you racist bastard.
Baby seal walks into a bar.
Bartender says "What'll it be?"
Baby seal says "Anything but a Canadian Club."
A doctor examining a little old man tells him, "You're suffering from exhaustion. How often do you have sex?"
The old guy says, "Every Monday, Wednesday and Friday."
The doc says, "Well, that could be the problem. Maybe you should try eliminating Wednesdays."
The old guy replies, "I can't, Doc. That's the only night I go home."
Sally: "Let's play house."
Little Johnny: "What do I do?"
Sally: "Communicate your feelings."
Johnny: "How do I do that?"
Sally: "Perfect. You can be the husband!"