Got home to find a man in bed with my wife. "Who said you could sleep with my wife?"
He said, "Everybody."
A young guy walks into a bar and as he passes an old man sitting there the old guy looks up and blurts out: "I fucked your mother."
The young guy ignores the old coot and keeps on walkin' when the old guy shouts: "Your mother sucks my dick".
So the young guy turns back and says: "Dad... your drunk... go home."
Three guys and a girl are marooned on a desert island. After one week, the girl is so ashamed of what she's doing, she kills herself.
After another week, the guys are so ashamed of what they're doing, they bury her.
After another week, they're so ashamed of what they're doing, they dig her up again.
A Catholic boy in confession says, "Bless me Father, I have sinned, I masturbated while thinking about my sister."
"That's a disgrace," said the priest, "especially when you have two gorgeous brothers."