Whats the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb?
You can unscrew a lightbulb.
What’s the difference between being hungry and horny?
Where you put the cucumber.
A drunk walking home one night staggers into a tree. He backs up, takes a step, and runs into the tree again.
Two more times he bumps into the tree, then curses: "Great. I shoulda been home 2 hours ago, and here I am lost in the damn forest."
A woman asks the pharmacist if he carries extra-large condoms. The pharmacist replies, "Yes, would you like to buy some?"
The woman says, "No, but do you mind if I stand here and wait for the next guy that buys a box?"
