This is an old one, and perhaps a bit over the top, but really funny!
Your stock went down!
What do you call a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench?
The NBA.
Why doesn't Santa have any children?
Because he only comes once a year, and when he does, it's down the chimney.
What's worse than getting your keys stuck inside your car when you're parked outside an abortion clinic?
Going in to ask if you can borrow a coat hanger.
