My wife seemed a little down in the dumps. So I offered her some advice: "Honey, cheer up. Sometimes you just have to appreciate the little things in life."
She looked at me and replied: "How do you think I've stuck with you?"
1. Remember to text my girlfriend a big lovey dovey message at the start of the day. 2. Remember to buy her a card in my lunch break. 3. Buy her some more crap in the rush hour after work before I meet her. 4. Take her to a fancy restaurant and pay for a pointlessly expensive meal. 5. Take her back to her place and give her some gentle, passionate love when all I want to do is excessively bang her.
And I have to do all this, then drive home without my wife finding out!
