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: Created: 14 October 2016; Hits: 2519

Why is a drunk at a massage parlor like a bumper sticker?

No matter how you pull it they're hard to get off.

Don't Miss These Jokes!

Doctor Patient Confidentiality

A guy goes to see his doctor. In the exam room the doctor asks, "What brings you here today?" The guy says, "Before I show you, you have to promise not to laugh." The doctor nods, and the guys pulls down his pants and reveals an incredibly small penis.

Holding back laughter, the doctor manages to ask, "What exactly is the problem?"

The guy tells him, "Can't you see doc... it's swollen."

A Senior Moment

Two old ladies are sitting on the park bench feeding the pigeons. Suddenly the first one says to her friend: "Did you just fart?"

Her friend answers: "Of course I did. You think I always smell like this?"

Nag Nag Nag

Jake the farmer has an incredibly nagging wife. One day he's out in the field, she brings his lunch to him, and then sits there and berates him while he's eating. Suddenly, the mule kicks up his back legs, smacking her in the head, and it kills her instantly.

At the wake, the minister notices that when a woman offers her sympathy, Jake nods his head up and down, but when a man comes up and speaks to him, he shakes his head from side to side. The minister says to Jake, "Why was it that you nod your head up and down to all the women and shake your head from side to side to all the men?"

Jake says, "The women all say how nice she looks, and how pretty her dress is. The men all say, Is that mule for sale?'"