Why is a drunk at a massage parlor like a bumper sticker?
No matter how you pull it they're hard to get off.
Why won't cannibals eat divorced women?
They're too bitter.
I needed hearing aids, so I asked my doc for the latest technology. You know... the ones that connect directly to the 900 chat lines so I can listen "hands-free"... if you know what I mean.
My dick's so big it was overthrown by a military coup. It's now known as the Democratic Republic of My Dick.