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Why is a drunk at a massage parlor like a bumper sticker?

No matter how you pull it they're hard to get off.

Guy walks into a bar with a big bruise in the middle of his forehead. The bartender asks: "What happened?"

The guy tells him: "I was fucking my wife doggy style and she ran under the house."

My girlfriend caught me drying my dick with the hair dryer. She asked: "What are you doing?"

Apparently "Heating up your dinner." wasn't the right answer.

How can you tell a sumo wrestler from a feminist?

A Sumo wrestler shaves his legs.