How do you know who gives a good blow job?
Word of mouth.
My wife cheats when we play board games. Last night I'm playing Monopoly with the kids and she was in the garage bangin' the landscaper.
My wife wanted to test me. So she asked: "Honey, what would you do if you came home and caught me in bed with another guy."
I told her: "I'd kick his seeing eye dog."
And that's when the fight started...
What's a necrophiliac's biggest complaint about sex?
She just kinda lays there.