What's the difference between pink and purple?
The grip!
My wife asked me to guess what she wanted for her birthday.
So I said: "Your face from 10 years ago?"
And that's when the fight started...
A wife tells her husband: "I have good news & bad news." The husband says: "Just give me the good news."
The wife: "The paperboy isn't sterile."
My wife saw a Craigslist ad where a guy was offering to swap his wife for a season ticket to the stadium. She looked at me and asked: "Would you swap me for a season ticket?"
"Absolutely not," I told her. "The season's more than half over!"
