How can you tell if a chick is too fat to screw?
You pull her pants down and her ass is still in 'em.
What is the cheapest meat?
Deer balls, they're under a buck.
A doctor told his patient her test results came back and she had a rare disease with only 6 months to live.
"That's such a short amount of time." the woman begged, "Isn't there anything I can do?"
"Marry a lawyer," the doctor told her. "It will be the longest six months of your life."
Husband asks: "Should I watch porn or hockey?"
Wife: "Watch porn. You already know how to play hockey."
And that's when the fight started...
