Why is sex like Microsoft Windows?
For everyone who pays for it, there are hundreds getting it free.
Why don't women blink during foreplay?
They don't have time.
Two guys were in a bar. The first one said: "I can't break my wife of the habit of staying up until 5 in the morning."
"What is she doing?", his buddy asks.
"Waiting for me to get home."
I asked my grandma if she had ever tried 69.
She said, "No, but I have done 53 -- that's all the sailors I could screw in one night."
