Leaves A Bad Taste In Your Mouth

You know why you should never drink diet soda during oral sex?

Because that way you'll have two after-tastes to get rid of.

My wife will buy anything marked down. Last year she bought an escalator.

(With thanks to the great Henny Youngman.)

What do you call a nun with a sex change operation?

A tran-sister.

Man is incomplete until he’s married.

Then he’s finished.