My dick is so big, there's still snow on it in the summertime.
A lady goes golfing and gets hit in the ass really hard with a golf ball. She goes to the doctor.
The doctor says, "Where were you hit?" She says, "Between the first and the second hole."
He says, "That doesn't leave alot of room for a band-aid, does it?"
What is the irritating part around a blonde's pussy?
The other guys waiting their turn!
Harry and his wife go to a party on a Friday night.
Saturday morning they wake up and his wife tells him, "Boy, were you loaded last night. You insulted your boss for ten minutes straight. He finally fired you."
Harry says, "Fuck my boss."
She says, "I did. You go back to work Monday."