Very Much The Same

What do a condom & a coffin have in common?

You cum in one, go in the other & they both contain stiffs.

A third-grade teacher is getting to know her class on the first day of school. She turns to one little girl and asks, "So what does your daddy do?"

The little girl replies, "Whatever Mommy tells him to."

A brunette, a blonde & a redhead are all in 5th grade. Who has the biggest tits?

The blonde... she's 18!

Why is a drunk at a massage parlor like a bumper sticker?

No matter how you pull it they're hard to get off.