How can you tell a sumo wrestler from a feminist?
A Sumo wrestler shaves his legs.
A man calls the doctor and is frantic, "My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!"
"Is this her first child?" the doctor asks.
"No, you idiot!" the man shouts. "This is her husband!"
What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?
Gagged!
Why are women like a storm door?
The more you bang 'em ... the looser they get.
And once that happens ... not even a longer screw can fix it.