Ol' Grandpa At It Again

Last Christmas grandpa surprised eveyone and made snow angels.

He skidded on the ice and took out three pedestrians.

What's in the toilet of the star ship enterprise?

The captain's log.

What do you do when your dishwasher stops working?

Slap her on the ass and tell her to get back to work.

The bride, upon her engagement, went to her mother and said, "I've found a man just like father!"

Her mother replied, "So what do you want from me, sympathy?"