Two guys trying to get in a quick eighteen holes, but there are two terrible lady golfers in front of them hitting the ball everywhere but where it's supposed to go. The first guy says, "Why don't you go over and ask if we play through?"
The second guy gets about halfway there and comes back. The first guy says, "What's wrong?" His buddy says, "One of them is my wife, and the other one is my mistress." The first guy says, "That could be a problem. I'll go over."
He gets about halfway there and comes back. The second guy says, "What's wrong?"
A man and his wife are dining at a table in a plush restaurant, and the husband keeps staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sits alone at a nearby table. The wife asks, “Do you know her?”
“Yes,” sighs the husband, “She’s my ex-girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up seven years ago, and I hear she hasn’t been sober since.”
“My God!” says the wife, “Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long.”