What do you call a man who lost all his intelligence?
A widower.
I turned my whole life around.
I used to be depressed and miserable. Now I'm miserable and depressed.
A guy says, "For our Twentieth Anniversary, I'm taking my wife to Australia."
His friend says, "That's going to be tough to beat. What're you going to do for your Twenty-Fifth Anniversary?"
The first guy says, "I'm going to go back and get her."
You didn't know old Dick Johnson is a bit of a poet, did you. Yep! My dick is a Longfellow.
