How do you know when you are getting old?
When you start having dry dreams and wet farts.
When would you want a man's company?
When he owns it.
How can you tell a blind guy at a nude beach?
It's not hard.
Guy tells his buddy: "I think I've become di-sexual."
Friend asks: "Di-sexual? What the hell is that?"
Guy says: "If I don't get me some pussy pretty soon... I'm gonna kill myself."