Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Breasts don't have eyes.
An old couple's sitting in the living room. The wife turns to her husband and says, "Let's go upstairs and fuck." He looks back and tells her, "I don't know if I can do both."
What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean.
A good start.
A drunk wakes up in a cemetery in a freshly-dug grave. He thinks: If I'm alive, why's there a tombstone? If I'm dead, why do I have to piss?
