Why is sperm white and piss yellow?
So you know if you're cumming or going!
An accordion player and a banjo player are hired to play together on New Year's Eve.
At the end of the party, the guy who hired them says, "You guys were great. You want to play for me again next New Year's Eve?"
The banjo player says, "Sure. Can we leave our stuff?"
Dwarf to doctor: You're pretty busy. You treat dwarfs?
Doc: Yeah but you'll have to be a little patient.
How's pussy like pizza?
The worst you'll ever have won't be all that bad.