What can a goose do, a duck can't, and your lawyer should?
Stick his bill up his ass.
Two blondes are talking geography. The first one asks: "Which do you think is further away, Florida or the moon?"
Her pal replies: "Hellooo, can you see Florida from here?"
Wife gets naked and asks hubby, "What turns you on more, my pretty face or my sexy body?"
Hubby looks her up and down and replies, "Your sense of humor!"
And that's when the fight started...
I asked my wife: "Where do you want to go for our anniversary, honey?"
It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation.
"Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said.
So I suggested: "How about the kitchen?"