Biggest Turkey You Got

: Created: 27 November 2014; Hits: 1991

A lady was looking for a turkey but couldn't find one big enough. She asked the stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?"

The stock boy replied, "No. They're dead."

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Here's how you can get the kids home for Thanksgiving.

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"Pop, what are you talking about?" the son screams. "We can't stand the sight of each other any longer," the father says. "We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Chicago and tell her."

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So my wife grabbed the remote and barked: "For Christ's sake, leave it on the porn channel. You already know how to fish."

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Guy walks into a bar with a big bruise in the middle of his forehead. The bartender asks: "What happened?"

The guy tells him: "I was fucking my wife doggy style and she ran under the house."