Difference between a blonde and an ironing board?
An ironing board's legs are hard to open.
You know old Dick tries to stay pretty busy. Last week I did a benefit for the "Tempura House"... that's a shelter for lightly battered women.
What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer?
A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
A lawyer asks his partner, "Are you fucking the new secretary?"
The partner tells him, "No."
So the first lawyer says, "Great! Then you fire her."
