How come during sex it's OK to say, 'Who's your daddy?,' but it's not OK to say, 'I love you, mommy'?
What do you do when you see your husband staggering in the back yard?
Shoot him again.
A Jew, a Catholic and a Mormon were having drinks at the bar after an interfaith convention.
The Jew, bragging about his virility said, "I have four sons, one more and I’ll have a basketball team!"
The Catholic pooh-poohed this accomplishment, stating, "That’s nothing, I have 10 sons, one more and I’ll have a football team."
To which the Mormon replied, "You guys don't have a clue. I have 17 wives, one more and I’ll have a golf course!"
Three guys are sitting in a bar bitching about how stupid their wives are.
The first guy says, "My wife is so dumb, she carries an automatic garage door opener in her car and we don't even have a garage."
The second guy says, "My wife is so dumb, she listens to her iPod and she doesn't have any earphones for it."
The third guy says, "My wife is so dumb, she carries a purse full of condoms and she doesn't even have a dick."
