Don't Drink And Drive

: Created: 27 March 2017; Hits: 2548

Dick's Advice: Best way to avoid an alcohol-related accident? Get so fucked up you can't find your car.

Don't Miss These Jokes!

The Harder They Suck...

What's the difference between a hooker and a mosquito?

The hooker sucks harder when you smack her.

A Financial Discussion

I told my wife our credit cards were stolen, but I'm not reporting it.

She asked why not?

"Cause the thief spends less than you do."

And that's when the fight started...

What's The Scoop

I came home last night with a half gallon of rocky road and asked my wife: "Want some ice cream?" So she responded: "How hard is it?" I told her with a wink: "As hard as my dick!"

She said: "Great, pour me some."

And that's when the fight started...