Why does it hurt so much to fuck a chef?
He'll stick a fork in you to see if you're done.
Wife walks into the kitchen and finds her husband stalking around with a fly swatter. "What are you doing?" she asks. "Hunting flies," he tells her.
"Oh, kill any?" She asked. "Yep, three males, two females," was his reply. Intrigued, she asked, "How can you tell?"
"Easy," he says. "Three were on a beer can, two were on the phone."
Little schoolgirl asks her mom: "Is it true that babies come out where boys put their wieners in?" "Yes, honey." her mom assures her.
"Won't that knock my teeth out?"
My wife and I were discussing babies and she had a thought. "Why do doctors spank newborn babies?"
I told her: "To knock the dicks off the stupid ones."
And that's when the fight started...
