What do you call a nurse with dirty knees?
The head nurse.
My wife was complaining I fart too much, so she ripped a big one right back at me. I asked her, "Honey, you never did that when we were dating. How come?"
She said, "'Cause I didn't get an asshole till we were married."
And that's when the fight started...
What can a goose do, a duck can't, and your lawyer should?
Stick his bill up his ass.
What's the difference between a good lawyer and a great lawyer?
A good lawyer knows the law, but a great lawyer knows the judge.
