I once went on date with a girl who didn't swallow.
There was soup everywhere!
A man calls his wife into the bedroom. "I want to show you the new watch I got today."
She walks in and finds him with his pants down. "That's not a watch!" she says.
"It will be once you put two hands and a face on it."
Why don't women blink during foreplay?
They don't have time.
A Chinese guy calls his boss and says: "Me sick... Can`t come to work today." The Boss says: "No problem. When I'm sick, I fuck my wife... try that!"
Two hours later the Chinese guy rings back and says: "Me better now... you got a nice house!"
