Maybe He Should Go To a Sperm Bank?

How does a guy know if he has a high sperm count?

If the girl has to chew, before she swallows.

Researchers have determined that 99% of all men jerk off in the shower and the other 1% sing.

Do you know what they sing?

I didn't think you did.

A guy visits his doctor. He walks in with a banana stuck in one ear, a carrot in the other and a french fry up his nose.

He says, "Doc, I feel terrible."

The doc says, "You're just not eating right."

What would you call a dead prostitute?

Free.