What's brown and sits on a piano bench?
Beethoven's First Movement.
What is the definition of confidence?
When your wife catches you in bed with another woman and you slap her on the ass and say, "You're next Baby... !"
What is the difference between ooooooh and aaaaaaah?
About three inches.
Dwarf to doctor: You're pretty busy. You treat dwarfs?
Doc: Yeah but you'll have to be a little patient.
