Why does a bride smile as she walks down the aisle?
Because she knows she's given her last blowjob.
Tragically Mickey and Minnie Mouse found themselves in divorce court.
The judge asked Mickey: "Mr. Mouse, are you telling this court that you wish to divorce your wife simply because you think she's crazy?"
Mickey replied: "I never said she was crazy... I said she was fuckin' Goofy!"
What do you say to a lawyer with an IQ of 50?
"Good morning, Your Honor."
My wife and I were basking in the afterglow of having sex when she asked: "Honey, why did God create orgasms?"
I said: "So women can moan even when they’re happy."
And that's when the fight started...
