My dick is so big, it won't return Spielberg's calls.
Did you hear about the junkie that was addicted to brake fluid?
He said he could stop anytime.
My wife wanted to be a little adventurous. She told me she was up for making a sex tape.
I said, "Great, we should hold auditions for your part."
And that's when the fight started...
Difference between women & a washing machine? Dump your load in a washing machine doesn't call a week later.
