A 54 year old accountant decides to leave his wife, and to rub it in at the same time. So he writes her a letter that reads: Dear Wife, I am 54, and by the time you get this letter I will be at the Grand Hotel with my beautiful and sexy 18 year old secretary.
When he arrives at the hotel the front desk clerk hands him a letter that was waiting for him. It read: Dear Husband, I too am 54 and by the time you receive this letter I will be at the Surfside Motel with my handsome and virile 18 year old boy toy.You being an accountant can certainly appreciate that 18 goes into 54 more times than 54 goes into 18
A Frenchman and an Italian were seated next to an American on an overseas flight. After a few cocktails, the men began discussing their sex lives.
"Last night I made love to my wife four times," the Frenchman bragged, "and this morning she made me delicious crepes and she told me how much she adored me."
"Ah, last night I made love to my wife six times," the Italian responded, "and this morning she made me a wonderful omelet and told me she could never love another man."
When the American remained silent, the Frenchman smugly asked, "And how many times did you make love to your wife last night?" "Once," he replied. "Only once?" the Italian arrogantly snorted. "And what did she say to you this morning?"