Why can't blondes parallel park? 'Cause guys keep telling them that 4 inches is really 8 inches.
The other night I was having sex with my wife when my cell phone rang. I answered it and said: "Can I call you back? I'm in the tub."
And that's when the fight started...
Gal to salesman: "Should I buy a sweatshirt or a windbreaker?"
"Depends. You gonna sweat or break wind?"
Last night, I finally realized a longtime fantasy... I came all over my girlfriend's face.
Man, was she pissed when she woke up.
