Why can't blondes parallel park? 'Cause guys keep telling them that 4 inches is really 8 inches.
How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened by the time she brings it to the couch.
It was our anniversary and I asked my wife if she remembered out wedding vows when the minister said "for better or worse?"
She said: "Yeah... You couldn't do any better and I couldn't do any worse."
And that's when the fight started...
Harry and his wife go to a party on a Friday night.
Saturday morning they wake up and his wife tells him, "Boy, were you loaded last night. You insulted your boss for ten minutes straight. He finally fired you."
Harry says, "Fuck my boss."
She says, "I did. You go back to work Monday."