Depends On What You Call It

Why is a pap smear called a pap smear?

Because women wouldn't do them if they were called cunt scrapes.

Love Those Easter Eggs

Why does the Easter Bunny hide Easter eggs?

He doesn't want anyone knowing he's been fucking the chickens!

Creation Of Man

Why did God create Adam before he created Eve?

Because He didn't want anyone telling him how to make Adam.

It Takes More Than One

After weeks without gettin' any I got really pissed off and asked my wife: "What has two arms, two legs, two boobs & sucks?"

Before she could even think of a reply I told her: "You and a vacuum cleaner."

And that's when the fight started...