What do you call two lesbians in a closet?
A liqour cabinet.
Why are cowgirls like cow pies?
The older they get the easier they are to pick up.
For their 10th anniversary, a wife surprises her husband by wearing the lingerie she wore on their wedding night. She asks him what his exact thoughts were 10 years ago when he first saw her in the lingerie.
He tells her, "I wanted to suck your tits dry and fuck your brains out." "Well, what do you think today?" she asks,
He says, "Mission accomplished!"
And that's when the fight started...