Guy goes to his doctor for a checkup. After, they sit down in a private office to discuss the results. The doc starts with: "I have good news and I have bad news."
The guy says: "Give me the bad news doc." The doctor replies: "You've got cancer!"
The guy is shocked, but quickly asks: "So what's the good news?"
The doctor looks him in the eye and tells him: "I'm fucking the receptionist."
Why did the woman leave her husband after he spent all their money on a penis enlarger?
She just couldn’t take it any longer.
What do you say to a lawyer with an IQ of 50?
"Good morning, Your Honor."
A young couple were driving down country road in total silence, having had a little disagreement at their last stop. As they passed a barnyard full of mules and pigs, the husband sarcastically asked, "Are they relatives of yours?"
"Yes," his wife replied. "I married into the family."
And that's when the fight started...