A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Dick's Joke of the Day

Just Beat It

What's the difference between meat and chicken?

If you beat your chicken, it dies.

Not Necessarily From The Bronx

What's the definition of a Yankee?

Same thing as a quickie only you do it yourself.

Wait For It

Polar bear walks into a bar, asks for a gin...
.
.
.
.
.
and tonic.

Bartender asks: "Why the long pause?"

Back And Forth Exchange

Wife to her husband in frustration: "Get the fuck out." Then, as he's leaving, she adds, "I hope you die a slow painful death."

He turns back to her and says, "So now you want me to stay?"

And that's when the REAL fight started...

Don't Miss These Jokes!

Forgive Me For I Have Sinned

A 100-year-old man enters a Catholic confessional and admits "Father, last night I had sex with a couple of 18-year-old girls and it lasted for hours."

The priest sternly replies "That is a sin, I'm going to give you a penance."

The old man laughs "That won't be necessary father, I'm Jewish."

The father, confused, asks "Why are you telling me this?"

"I'm telling everyone!"

Who's Thirsty?

What do you call a virgin on a water bed?

A cherry float.

Doggie Style

A guy, seeing two dogs going at it on the lawn says to his buddy, "You and your wife ever do it like that?"

"Only once" says his friend. "And it took 5 drinks to get her out in the yard."