Eyeglass Problem Solved
What should you do if your sister-in-law sits on your glasses & breaks them?
Take them off next time.
What should you do if your sister-in-law sits on your glasses & breaks them?
Take them off next time.
Every morning the teacher took roll call by having her students stand up and recite a short poem. The first to go sat in the front row and was the teacher's pet. He stood and said, "My name is Dan. When I grow up to be a man, I want to go to Japan... if I can, and I think I can."
Next up was a little girl who sat in the middle of the room. She stood and answered roll call by reciting, "My name is Suzy. When I become a lady, I would like to have a baby... if I can, and I think I can."
Finally it was Little Johnny's turn, a wise guy who sat way in the back of the room. He stood up and said, "My name is Johnny, and I don't give a crap about Japan. But I'd sure like to help Suzy with her plan... if I can, and you bet your sweet ass I can!"
What's the difference between a musician and a pizza?
A pizza can feed a family of four.
I told my wife: You know the trouble with most women? They get all excited over nothing!"
She said: "Yeah, I know what you mean, I married him."
And that's when the fight started...