You Know You've Done It
Women are like parking spots. With all the good ones taken & nobody looking, you stick it in a disabled one.
Women are like parking spots. With all the good ones taken & nobody looking, you stick it in a disabled one.
What would you call a hooker with jizz all over her face?
Call her a cab ... her job is done.
Easy, inexpensive way to get rid of weeds: Put 2 cups of Epsom salt and a 1/4 cup of dish soap in a gallon of vinegar. Shake well.
Then tell your family you're going to mix it in their food if they don't get off their lazy asses and go outside and yank up the goddamned crabgrass.
A new bride was embarrassed to be on her honeymoon. When she and her husband pulled up to the hotel, she asked him if there was any way that they could make it appear as if they had been married a long time.
He responded, "Sure. You carry the luggage!"
And that's when the fight started...