Two guys are having a couple of beers and talking about their wives. "Do you and your wife ever do it doggy style?" asks the first one.
"Well, not exactly," replies his friend. "She just pretends to be a dog." "Very kinky." says the first guy.
"Well, not really... Whenever I lean over and whisper let's do it doggy style, she rolls over and plays dead."
If you force a prostitute to screw you, is it rape or shoplifting?
You choose.
We named our daughter after my wife's mother.
Passive Aggressive Psycho turns 5 next week.
After dinner last night my wife looked at me with those eyes of hers and sweetly asked: "Honey, is it OK if we change positions tonight?" "Sure" I replied.
"Great" She said, "You do the dishes and I'll go sit on the couch and fart!"
And that's when the fight started...