Why Santa Doesn't Have Children
Why doesn't Santa have any children?
Because he only comes once a year, and when he does, it's down the chimney.
Why doesn't Santa have any children?
Because he only comes once a year, and when he does, it's down the chimney.
Why do women wear black underwear?
They're in mourning for the stiff they buried the night before.
A guy walks into a bar, orders 12 shots & starts drinking them as fast as he can. The bartender asks, "Dang, why are you drinking so fast?"
The guy says, "You would be drinking fast, too, if you had what I had." The bartender asks, "What do you have?"
The guy says, "75 cents."
I told my wife, "Honey, I bought some Olympic condoms today. I think I'll wear Gold tonight."
She replied, "Why not wear Silver and not finish first for a change?"
And that's when the fight started...