Leaky Pipes
Old guy calls a plumber. "There's a leak over my kitchen table."
The plumber asks him "When did you first notice it?"
"After it took me two hours to finish my soup last night."
Old guy calls a plumber. "There's a leak over my kitchen table."
The plumber asks him "When did you first notice it?"
"After it took me two hours to finish my soup last night."
How do you know when a male porn star is at the gas station?
Right before the gas stops pumping he pulls out the nozzle and sprays it all over the car.
What's the difference between pussy & pot?
If you can smell pot from across the room it's the good stuff.
Johnson finds wife in bed with a friend, shoots him.
"Keep behaving like that you'll lose all your friends." she snaps at him.
And that's when the fight started...