May I Ask Who's Calling
A man calls the doctor and is frantic, "My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!"
"Is this her first child?" the doctor asks.
"No, you idiot!" the man shouts. "This is her husband!"
A man calls the doctor and is frantic, "My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!"
"Is this her first child?" the doctor asks.
"No, you idiot!" the man shouts. "This is her husband!"
What does a Rubik's Cube and a dick have in common?
The more you play with it the harder it gets.
How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?
Cut the rope.
It was our anniversary and I was reminiscing with my wife. She asked if I could remember way back when.
I told her: "You know honey, I can remember where we got married and I can remember when we got married... I just can’t remember why."
And that's when the fight started.