I was in bed with this chick last night. She turned to me and whispered in a low, sexy voice: "I want tonight to be magical"
So I fucked her and disappeared.
Why'd my wife cross the road?
To get back to the shoe store we were in three fucking hours ago.
My wife wanted to test me. So she asked: "Honey, what would you do if you came home and caught me in bed with another guy."
I told her: "I'd kick his seeing eye dog."
And that's when the fight started...