Three guys and a girl are marooned on a desert island. After one week, the girl is so ashamed of what she's doing, she kills herself.
After another week, the guys are so ashamed of what they're doing, they bury her.
After another week, they're so ashamed of what they're doing, they dig her up again.
What do you call a woman who can suck a lemon through a 40-foot garden hose.
Darling.
I overheard my girlfriend on the phone say to her friend she wants to get engaged on Valentine's Day.
Hope she finds someone nice.
My wife and I were discussing the differences between men and women. She asked: "So what do you think the biggest difference is?"
I told her: "What comes to mind when I say I'd like to give you a facial!"
And that's when the fight started...