This Is Why Hockey Players Wear Them

What does a bull do to stay warm on a cold day?

He heads over to the barn and slips into a nice warm Jersey.

(Ah please... just google it!)

Not Your Ordinary Guy Walks Into A Bar Joke

Guy walks into a bar with a big bruise in the middle of his forehead. The bartender asks: "What happened?"

The guy tells him: "I was fucking my wife doggy style and she ran under the house."

Mom's Best Advice

"Mom I tied the knot."

"Great. Now kick out the chair he's standing on & you're finally rid of the jerk."

A Dream Shattered

My wife came out of the shower, winked at me and said, "I shaved my pussy! You know what that means?"

I said, "Yeah the fucking drain is clogged again."

And that's when the fight started...