A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

twitter facebook youtube 27330664 ml50x52

Dick's Joke of the Day

Easy To Figure Out

What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?

A mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.

World Renown

I want you to know I'm famous for more than just this website. My dick was in the Guiness Book of World Records.

Until the librarian kicked me out.

Let's Pretend

Sally: "Let's play house."

Little Johnny: "What do I do?"

Sally: "Communicate your feelings."

Johnny: "How do I do that?"

Sally: "Perfect. You can be the husband!"

Another Perspective On Marriage

I razzed my wife: "I shoulda never got married. Why buy the whole cow when I was gettin' the milk for free?"

She snapped back: "Yeah? Well I got stuck with the whole pig for just one little sausage."

And that's when the fight started...

Don't Miss These Jokes!

Just Normal Porn Star Behavior

How do you know when a male porn star is at the gas station?

Right before the gas stops pumping he pulls out the nozzle and sprays it all over the car.

Seize The Moment

A guy comes home from work and finds his wife on her hands and knees in the kitchen scrubbing the floor. She only has an apron on so the husband gets a big hard on. Seizing the moment he quickly slips it in and starts humping her doggie style. When he's through he pulls out and at the same time hits her real hard up side the head.

"What was that for?" the wife screamed "Here I am being so nice to you, letting you really enjoy yourself. Why'd you hit me?"

The husband looks at her and says "For not looking back to see who it was."

The Latest Technology

I told my pal: "I got a brand new digital hearing aid, $10,000!" "What kind is it?" he asked.

"Six-thirty."