Not My Type Of Girl
What's the difference between the lesbians in porn films and a lesbian in real life?
About 65 pounds.
What's the difference between the lesbians in porn films and a lesbian in real life?
About 65 pounds.
A guy says to his new girlfriend: "Why are you always playing with my balls?"
She says: "Because I miss mine."
Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?
You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit!
My wife and I attended a lecture on diet and health given by a prominent doctor.
"The things we put into our stomachs should have killed most of us sitting here, years ago." He said. "Red meat is awful. Soft drinks corrode our stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High fat diets can be disastrous. And none of us realize the long-term harm caused by impurities in our drinking water. However, there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all have eaten it, or will eat it. Can anyone tell me what we eat that causes the most grief and suffering lasting for years after we eat it?"
I leaned over to my wife and whispered "I think he means wedding cake."
And that's when the fight started...