No Need To Call The Fire Department
When's it okay to spit in an Italian girl's face?
When her moustache is on fire.
When's it okay to spit in an Italian girl's face?
When her moustache is on fire.
A guy walks into a whorehouse looking for some action. He goes up to the madame and asks,"Hey, can I get a piece from one of your fine ladies?"
"Sorry sir," the madame responds, "but, we're all full." "Aw, please." he begs, "I'm super horny and I really need some poontang!"
The madame thinks for a moment then answers, "Well, there is one girl left but when you go meet her you have to wear this black condom." "Whatever," the guy shrugs and runs upstairs.
A few hours later he comes back down and says, "Wow, that was great. She didn't even make any noise. But why did I have to wear the black condom?"
The madame answered, "Out of respect for the dead."
A guy gets a prescription from his doctor for Viagra with the instruction to take it one hour before sex.
He gets home, checks his watch and looking for a little action he pops a pill an hour before his wife is due home from work.
But just as he was expecting her, she phoned to say that she would be home late while she ran some errands.
In a panic, he phoned the doctor. "What should I do?" he asked. "I've taken the pill but the effects will wear off by the time my wife gets home."
"I see," said the doctor. "It is a shame to waste it. Do you have a maid?" "Yes." "Well, you could occupy yourself with her instead?"
"But I don't need Viagra with the maid."
It was our anniversary and I asked my wife if she remembered out wedding vows when the minister said "for better or worse?"
She said: "Yeah... You couldn't do any better and I couldn't do any worse."
And that's when the fight started...