A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Dick's Joke of the Day

Your Kind Of Game?

What is the only game in which the more you lose, the more you have to show for it?

Strip Poker.

Who Likes Bananas?

I used to get a hard-on just watching my wife eat a banana.

Now I only get a hard-on if she's choking on it.

Great Inventors In History

Teacher: Who knows the inventor of the car air conditioner?

Little Johnny: 3 Jewish guys. Hi, Norm and Max.

Best If Used By

Wife asks her spouse: "What are you doing?" Her husband says: "Nothing." So she presses him: "Nothing...? You've been reading our marriage certificate for the last hour."

He tells her: "Well... yeah... I was looking for the expiration date."

And that's when the fight started...

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They Have A Name For That

What do you call a guy who cries when he masturbates?

A tearjerker.

A Financial Discussion

I told my wife our credit cards were stolen, but I'm not reporting it.

She asked why not?

"Cause the thief spends less than you do."

And that's when the fight started...

Depends on Which End You Are On

A little girl asked her mom: "When you and daddy have sex, who enjoys it more?"

Her mother thought for a moment and replied: "Sweetie, you know when you have an itch in your ear and you stick your finger in and wiggle it around to make it go away? Think about it... which feels better, your finger or your ear?"