Sounds Like Spring Break

A brunette tells her blonde sister "Last night I slept with a Brazilian."

The blonde sister replies "I thought I was the slut! How many is a Brazilian?"

Survival Skills

Three nuns and a priest are stranded in the desert. Luckily, they come across a camel. So they all jump on and head off to find help. After a while the camel is totally exhausted and falls down dead.

The priest says " Well sisters, this looks like the end. Do any of you have any last request?"

The first nun says "Father I have never had sex before." So the priest thinking this is their last day on earth, says OK and has sex with her.

The second nun says " I too father have never had sex before." So the priest thinks well, why not, and has sex with her too.

The priest then asked the third nun if her request is the same. She says "Not exactly father. I would just like to know what is that between your legs."

The priest says "Sister, that is a penis. It was put there by god to give the gift of life."

The last nun then responds "Great! Stick it in the camel and let's get the fuck out of here."

It's Obvious When You Think About It

What do you call a rabbit with no feet?

Unlucky.

Tough Times Call For One Thing...

My wife was concerned that we weren't managing the household well in tough financial times. So she asked me to take some action and plan for the future.

No problem I told her. I ran out and came home with 2 cases of beer instead of one.

And that's when the fight started...