A young guy walks into a bar and as he passes an old man sitting there the old guy looks up and blurts out: "I fucked your mother."
The young guy ignores the old coot and keeps on walkin' when the old guy shouts: "Your mother sucks my dick".
So the young guy turns back and says: "Dad... your drunk... go home."
My dick's so big it was overthrown by a military coup. It's now known as the Democratic Republic of My Dick.
World population has become a big problem. Experts say every 4 seconds a woman gives birth to another baby.
Our problem? We have to find this woman and stop her.
My wife and I were discussing the news. I said: "What's the big deal about same-sex marriage?"
She said: "You're right. We've been married for years, and we keep having the same lousy sex."
And that's when the fight started...