Things Are Tough All Over

Life is like a dick. Simple soft straight relaxed & hanging free.

Then a woman comes along & makes it hard.

Cop pulls a guy over at 3am: "Where you going at this hour?"

Guy says: "To a lecture on alcohol abuse, its effect on the human body. And the dangers of smoking & staying out late."

"Really? Who's giving that lecture at this time of night?"

"My wife."

A cop pulls a guy over and says, "Hey pal... did you know your wife fell out a few blocks back?"

"Thank God... I thought I went deaf."

What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?

Gagged!