1. Remember to text my girlfriend a big lovey dovey message at the start of the day. 2. Remember to buy her a card in my lunch break. 3. Buy her some more crap in the rush hour after work before I meet her. 4. Take her to a fancy restaurant and pay for a pointlessly expensive meal. 5. Take her back to her place and give her some gentle, passionate love when all I want to do is excessively bang her.
And I have to do all this, then drive home without my wife finding out!
I was furious when I found our joint checking account was empty. When I confronted my wife all she said was, "It's my turn." "What do you mean, your turn?" I shot back.
"In bed," she told me, "you've been making early withdrawals for years. Now... it's my turn."
