How did Pinocchio find out he was made out of wood?
His hand caught fire.
A wife went to see a therapist. "I've got a big problem. Every time we're in bed and my husband climaxes he lets out this ear splitting yell."
"My dear," the shrink said, "that's completely normal. I don't see what the problem is."
"The problem is," she complained, "It wakes me up!"
Two guys were in a bar. The first one said: "I can't break my wife of the habit of staying up until 5 in the morning."
"What is she doing?", his buddy asks.
"Waiting for me to get home."
What did the dick say to the balls?
You guys hang around here while I go inside.
