When's it okay to spit in an Italian girl's face?
When her moustache is on fire.
Topless babe walks up to 2 guys on the beach wearing Hawaiian shirts. They look her up and down and smile. She smiles back and says: "Hello, Fathers."
One guy asks her: "How did you know we're priests?"
"I'm Sister Mary Kathryn. We take vacations, too."
Here's a math question. If you get into bed 9 hours before you have to wake up, and your wife wants to have 2 hours of sex, how much sleep will you get?
Answer: 8 hours, 57 minutes - who cares what she wants!
A guy was complaining to his buddy that his new girlfriend was really kinky. His friend asked him: "How so?"
"Well" came the answer, "All she wants me to do is screw her in the ear." "In the ear? Wow. That is weird," his buddy remarked.
"Yeah," the guy continued. "Every time I go to stick my dick in her mouth, she turns her head."
