What do you call a guy who cries when he masturbates?
A tearjerker.
Here at Dick Joke of the Day we are thinking about selling our own brand of T-Shirts.
They'll read: "LIFE'S A DICK. WHEN IT GETS HARD, FUCK IT!"
The other night, my wife asked me how many women I'd slept with.
I told her, "Only you. All the others kept me up all night!"
And that's when the fight started...
I was walking in the park the other day with my wife when she pointed to a young couple sitting on a bench, passionately kissing. "Why don't you do that?" she asked.
"Honey," I replied, "I don't even know that woman!"
