A Good Day on the High Seas

A good-looking teenage girl went out fishing with six older guys.

She came home with a red snapper.

What actress would you like to be stuck in an elevator with?

One who knows how to fix elevators.

How do you make your wife scream for an hour after sex?

Wipe your dick on the curtains.

Why is being in the military like a blowjob?

The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel.