A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Go F*ck Yourself

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Guy bought his wife a new coat and a dildo. Figured if she didn't like the coat, she could go fuck herself.

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Not Quite Like Yeezys

Did you hear they came out with a new lesbian shoe?

They're called Dikes. They have an extra long tongue and only take one finger to get off!

Hang On Tight

Little Johnny was passing his parents bedroom in the middle of the night in search of a glass of water. Hearing a lot of moaning and thumping, he peaks in and catches mommy and daddy in the act. Before daddy can even react, Little Johnny exclaims, "Oh boy! Horsey ride! Daddy, can I ride your back?"

Daddy, relieved that Johnny's not asking more uncomfortable questions, and seeing the opportunity not to break his stride, agrees...

Johnny hops on daddy and daddy gets back to businessn... pretty soon mommy starts moaning and gasping... Johnny cries out, "Hang on tight, Daddy! This is the part where me and the mailman usually get bucked off."

A Senior Moment

Two old ladies are sitting on the park bench feeding the pigeons. Suddenly the first one says to her friend: "Did you just fart?"

Her friend answers: "Of course I did. You think I always smell like this?"