Why is a drunk at a massage parlor like a bumper sticker?
No matter how you pull it they're hard to get off.
Two Syrian hookers were talking about their problems. One said: "With the Russians jumping into this war we've got soldiers lined up around the block. I need a break!"
Her girlfriend agreed: "Yeah... I think we need to declare a no fly zone."
My wife and I were lying in bed last night. She gently leaned over and whispered: "I'm going to make you the happiest man in the world."
So I leaned over and whispered back: "I'm going to miss you."
And that's when the fight started...
My wife suggested: "Let’s go out and have some fun tonight!"
So I told her: "Sure... but if you get home before I do, leave the hall light on."
