I love dating manicurists and hair stylists.
One does hand jobs, the other does blow jobs!
I used to get a hard-on just watching my wife eat a banana.
Now I only get a hard-on if she's choking on it.
Gal to cashier: "I'm in a hurry, can you please check me out?"
Clerk looks her up & down: "Nice tits, babe!"
Why is a drunk at a massage parlor like a bumper sticker?
No matter how you pull it they're hard to get off.
