A good-looking teenage girl went out fishing with six older guys.
She came home with a red snapper.
My wife was at the sink grousing about the dishes again. She asked me: "How many honest, intelligent, caring men in the world does it take to do the dishes?"
I told her: "Both of them."
And that's when the fight started...
How do you get five hundred cows in a barn?
Put up a "Bingo" sign.
A guy asks his grandma, "Have you seen some pills around here? They are labeled LSD?"
His grandma replies, "Fuck your pills, there's a dragon in the kitchen!"
