DJ of the Day

"Every Sunday you go fishing, right?

Husband: "Yeah why?"

"The fish came by to tell you she's pregnant!"

The teacher asked the class to use the word indefinitely in a sentence?

Little Johnny raised his hand and said: "When your balls are slapping on the cheeks of her ass, you're in definitely."

The bride, upon her engagement, went to her mother and said, "I've found a man just like father!"

Her mother replied, "So what do you want from me, sympathy?"

My wife sidled up to me last night and asked: "Would you like a little pussy?"

I said: "I sure would, 'cause yours is as big as a house!"

And that's when the fight started...

Did you hear about the Jewish mother doll?

You pull the string and it says, "Again with the string..."

A drunk's walking along and smacks right into a tree. He backs up a few steps and then walks into the tree again. And then he does it again!

Finally he mumbles to himself, "This is great. I was supposed to be home hours ago, and here I am, lost in the fuckin' forest."

The difference between a whore & a bitch?

A whore fucks everyone at the party. The bitch? Everyone but you.

Dick's Joke of the Day