Relationship Expert
What's a platonic relationship?
That's a friendship between a girl and a guy who wants to fuck her.
What's a platonic relationship?
That's a friendship between a girl and a guy who wants to fuck her.
Little Johnny is walking along with his father and they pass two dogs that are going at it. He says, "Hey, Pop! What's happenin' over there?"
His father says, "Er... son, they're making a puppy."
That night, Little Johnny walks past his parents bedroom, and the old man's giving it to the old lady. Little Johnny says, "Hey, Pop! What's happenin' now?"
His father says, "Er...son, we're making you a baby brother."
Little Johnny says, "Well, flip her over. I'd rather have a puppy."
The teacher says to her new class, "For our first lesson, each of you will stand up, tell us your name, what your father does, spell what your father does, and then explain it to us. All right, Billy."
Billy stands up and says, "My name's Billy. My father's a lawyer, l-a-w-y-e-r, and he defends people in court."
The teacher says, "Very good. All right, Tyrone."
Tyrone stands up and says, "My name's Tyrone. My father's a pharmacist, f-a-m...f-a-r-n...f-n..."
The teacher says, "Tyrone, you go home tonight and learn how to spell pharmacist. All right, Angelo."
Angelo stands up and says, "My name's Angelo. My old man's a bookie, b-o-o-k-i-e, and if he was here, he'd give you nine-to-five Tyrone ain't spellin' pharmacist by tomorrow."
My wife and I were having a discussion about heaven. I told her she shouldn't worry 'cause she'll never get there. She asked: "How can you say that?"
I told her: "Because dragons never fly above 8,000 feet."
And that's when the fight started...