A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Dick's Joke of the Day

Come Before the Judge

What do you get when you sleep with a judge?

An honorable discharge.

Depends on Your Persepctive

My girlfriend thought I had a small penis.

I thought she was just shallow.

A Real Woman

A plane is about to crash. A woman stands up and yells, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman. Who's going to be man enough to do it?"

A large man stands up and rips his shirt off, "Here! Iron this!"

Best If Used By

Wife asks her spouse: "What are you doing?" Her husband says: "Nothing." So she presses him: "Nothing...? You've been reading our marriage certificate for the last hour."

He tells her: "Well... yeah... I was looking for the expiration date."

And that's when the fight started...

Don't Miss These Jokes!

Bachelor Lifestyle

What is the difference between a bachelor and a married man?

Bachelor comes home, sees what's in the refrigerator, goes to bed. Married man comes home, sees what's in the bed, and goes to the refrigerator.

The Clock Is Ticking

What's the definition of eternity?

The time between when you cum and when she leaves.

Going Downtown

When do you know you've been married too long?

The only reason you go down on it is because it doesn't talk back.