Best Way To Go
When I die, I want to go like my Grandfather...in his sleep.
Not screaming like the other passengers in his car.
When I die, I want to go like my Grandfather...in his sleep.
Not screaming like the other passengers in his car.
A teacher is teaching a class and she sees that Little Johnny isn't paying attention, so she asks him, "If there are three ducks sitting on a fence, and you shoot one, how many are left?"
Litle Johnny says, "None." The teacher asks, "Why?" Little Johnny tells her, "Because the shot scared them all off."
The teacher says, "No, the answer is two, but I like how you're thinking."
So Little Johnny asks the teacher, "If you see three women walking out of an ice cream parlor, one is licking her ice cream, one is sucking her ice cream, and one is biting her ice cream, which one is married?" The teacher says, "The one sucking her ice cream."
Little Johnny says, "No, the one with the wedding ring, but I like how you're thinking!"
What do cheerleaders say after sex?
"Thanks, guys!".
On our honeymoon night I asked my bride, "Honey... am I the first?"
She replied, "Why does everybody ask that?"
And that's when the fight started...