A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Dick's Joke of the Day

Gay Sperm ... ummm .. ewwww

What did one gay sperm say to the other gay sperm?

I can't see a thing with all this shit in here!

A Snap Diagnosis

Guy goes to psychiatrist wearing only saran wrap.

The doc tells him: "Well, I can clearly see your nuts."

Bad Habits Are Hard To Break

Two guys were in a bar. The first one said: "I can't break my wife of the habit of staying up until 5 in the morning."

"What is she doing?", his buddy asks.

"Waiting for me to get home."

Home Cookin'

My wife asked: "How was dinner?"

I told her: "It was fit for a king! Here King.... here boy..."

And that's when the fight started...

Don't Miss These Jokes!

Mental Health

I turned my whole life around.

I used to be depressed and miserable. Now I'm miserable and depressed.

What's New Pussycat?

Guy vists a doctor and tells him: Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass Of Home.'" The doctor says, "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome." The patient asks: "Is that common?"

The doctor says, "It's not unusual."

Ho Ho Ho, Now This Is A Merry Christmas

One Christmas Eve, Santa Claus comes down the chimney and is startled by a beautiful 19 year old blonde. She said "Santa, will you stay with me?"

Santa replied, "Ho Ho Ho gotta go, gotta go, gotta deliver these toys to good girls and boys."

So she took off her night gown, wearing only a bra and panties, she asked "Santa, now will you stay with me?"

"Ho Ho Ho gotta go, gotta go, gotta deliver these toys to good girls and boys."

She takes off everything and says "Santa, now will you stay with me?"

Santa replies "Gotta stay, gotta stay, can't get up the chimney with my d*ck this way!"