A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Dick's Joke of the Day

A True Wonderment!

I saw my wife bought one of those new Wonder Bras.

Goofing around I told her: "You know why they call it the Wonder Bra? When you take it off you wonder where your tits went."

And that's when the fight started...

I Came All Over That Place

Last night, I finally realized a longtime fantasy... I came all over my girlfriend's face.

Man, was she pissed when she woke up.

It's How They're Packed

How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips?

As soon as you open it, you realize it’s half empty.

Not Quite A Dozen Roses

My wife and I went to counseling to improve our marriage. While attending one session dealing with communication, the counselor instructed: "It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other."

Looking at me she said: "Can you describe your wife's favorite flower?"

I looked over, touched my wife's arm gently and whispered, "It's Pillsbury, isn't it?"

And that's when the fight started...

Don't Miss These Jokes!

Creation Of Man

Why did God create Adam before he created Eve?

Because He didn't want anyone telling him how to make Adam.

Leaky Pipes

Old guy calls a plumber. "There's a leak over my kitchen table."

The plumber asks him "When did you first notice it?"

"After it took me two hours to finish my soup last night."

The Danger of Leaving Town

Guy tells his brother, "I have to go to out of town for a couple of weeks. I need to leave my cat with you. Please take real good care of her." His brother says, "Relax. I got this."

A few days later, he calls his brother and asks, "So, how's my cat?" His brother tells him, "The cat's dead."

"Geeeez" says the guy, "Why'd you have to be so blunt? Couldn't you have broken it to me a little more gently? Like, you could have told me the cat was on the roof, and you had to call the Fire Department.  But just before they got there, she slipped and fell to the ground. So you scooped her up and rushed her to the vet. But there was nothing he could do to save her. Something like that would have been much more sensitive." His brother says, "Whatever."

So then the guy asks, "How's Mom?"

His brother thinks for a moment then says, "Uh... Mom's on the roof ..."