Strange Sexual Positions

A couple went to a sex therapist to try and improve their sex live. After hearing the couple's complaints, the therapist suggested they experiment a little more. "For example," he suggested, "You might try different positions, like the wheelbarrow. You lift her legs, penetrate, and off you go."

The eager husband was all for trying this new idea as soon as they got home.

"Well, OK," the hesitant wife agreed, "But on two conditions. First if it hurts, you'll stop right away, and second," she insisted, "You must promise we won't go past my mother's."

What Are You Worried About?

What did the banana say to the vibrator?

Why are you shaking she's going to eat me.

Better rethink this one

Old Dick Johnson sometimes has to re-think relationships.

Right now I think I'm spending way too much time with my girlfriend's family... I think her husband is getting suspicious.

Get A Little Culture

I took my wife to the art gallery. The 1st picture was a naked women with a small patch of leaves over her private parts. My wife didn't like it so she said: "Let's keep going."

When I didn't follow right away she turned and asked: "What are you waiting for?"

I told her: "Autumn."

And that's when the fight started...