So What Does It Mean?

What's it mean when two lesbians make love?

It doesn't mean dick.

Count On This Happening

Little Johnny came home and told his mom he got kicked out of mathematics class. His mom asked "What happened."

Little Johnny told her: "The teacher asked me, 'What comes after 69?' Apparently 'mouthwash' was the wrong answer!"

Call The Coroner

How can you tell if your husband is dead?

The sex is the same but you get to use the remote.

Remembering Our Vows

It was our anniversary and I asked my wife if she remembered out wedding vows when the minister said "for better or worse?"

She said: "Yeah... You couldn't do any better and I couldn't do any worse."

And that's when the fight started...