Will Help The Commute
Gal tells her friend, "I just read it's against the law to go topless in the New York subway."
Her friend says, "Thank God. It's bad enough when you catch your scarf in those doors."
Gal tells her friend, "I just read it's against the law to go topless in the New York subway."
Her friend says, "Thank God. It's bad enough when you catch your scarf in those doors."
How do you get your wife to stop sucking her thumb?
Draw a dick on it.
A guy was complaining to his buddy: "Man, I had it all - money, a big house, a luxury car, and most of all the love of a beautiful woman. And then POOF... just like that it was gone!"
'What happened?' asked his friend.
"My wife found out..."
My wife and I attended a lecture on diet and health given by a prominent doctor.
"The things we put into our stomachs should have killed most of us sitting here, years ago." He said. "Red meat is awful. Soft drinks corrode our stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High fat diets can be disastrous. And none of us realize the long-term harm caused by impurities in our drinking water. However, there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all have eaten it, or will eat it. Can anyone tell me what we eat that causes the most grief and suffering lasting for years after we eat it?"
I leaned over to my wife and whispered "I think he means wedding cake."
And that's when the fight started...