That's Why They Name Hurricanes After Women

How is a woman like a hurricane?

When they come, they're loud and wet, and when they leave, they take your house and car.

Go F*ck Yourself

Guy bought his wife a new coat and a dildo. Figured if she didn't like the coat, she could go fuck herself.

Talent From Top To Bottom

What do you call a guy who can sit on an ice cream cone and tell you the flavor?

A smartass!

Women Are Emotional

My wife told me I should be more affectionate.

So I told her I got a girlfriend.

And that's when the fight started...