All Roads Lead to the Bar

A Roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers, and says, “Five beers, please”.

Simple Test

Which is the odd one out a woman, a microwave or a freezer?

The microwave, the other two leak when they're fucked!

You Don't Have To Be An Epidemiologist

Question: Which is more vicious... Killer Bees or Asian Murder Hornets?

Answer: My ex-wife.

Looks Good To Me!

My wife told me to go out and get something that makes her look sexy.

When I came back she asked what did I get. I told her I got drunk.

And that's when the fight started...