Three Gals Having a Few Drinks

Three gals were sitting at a bar throwing back a few drinks and talking about their sex lives. The first woman said: "I call my husband the dentist. Nobody can drill like he does."

The second woman giggled and confessed: "I call my husband the miner because of his incredible shaft."

The third woman quietly sipped her whiskey until her friends said: "Say, what do you call your husband?" She frowned and said: "The postman." "Why the postman?" her friends asked.

"Because he always delivers late, and half the time it's in the wrong box."

Always Know What To Say

What do you say to a woman who won't suck your dick?

"Honey, I'm home."

It's How They're Packed

How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips?

As soon as you open it, you realize it’s half empty.

Don't Ask

My wife was curious. She asked: "When do married men stop jerking off?"

I told her: "When they get divorced."

And that's when the fight started...