A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Dick's Joke of the Day

Another Problem To Solve

Hired a 19 year-old Danish girl with huge tits to babysit.

Now where the fuck am I going to get some kids?

Question About A Blonde

Why was the blonde's belly button red and hurting after sex?

Her boyfriend was also blonde.

Cats Life

How do you know when your cat's done cleaning himself?

He's smoking a cigarette.

I'd Like To Point This Out

My wife came in complaining about me never lifting a finger around the house.

So I did - the middle one.

And that's when the fight started...

Don't Miss These Jokes!

Needs More Duct Tape

What's the best thing about duct tape?

It turns, "No! No!," into "Mmm! Mmm!"

Not the Same Old Routine

My wife wanted to be a little playful, so she whispered: "Say dirty things to me!"

So I said: "Bathroom, kitchen, living room..."

And that's when the fight started...

Who Stole My Drink?

A drunk calls the police, and says, "They stole my dashboard, they stole my steering wheel, they stole my brake pedal, they even stole my gas pedal..."

Then, before the cops can ask where he is, he says, "Hey, never mind, I'm in the back seat."