A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Dick's Joke of the Day

Do You Know How To Please A Woman?

Studies have been done to determine what pleases a woman. Turns out it takes only 3.4 inches to please a woman.

Doesn't matter if its Visa or MasterCard

Do You Not Have Any Shame?

So I went to the doctor for a physical and he told me I should stop jerking off. I asked him why should I stop?

He told me: "Because you're at a physical."

Not Like The Chicken

Why'd my wife cross the road?
To get back to the shoe store we were in three fucking hours ago.

Proper Treatment

My wife remarked: "That Alzheimer's is a horrible disease. If I ever got it I think I'd shoot myself"

I replied: "You said that five minutes ago."

And that's when the fight started....

Don't Miss These Jokes!

She Doesn't Give A F*ck!

What do you get when cross an attorney with a feminist?

A lawyer who won't fuck you.

Late But On Time

The angry wife met her husband at the door. There was alcohol on his breath and lipstick on his collar. "I assume," she snarled, "that there is a very good reason for you to come waltzing in here at five o'clock in the morning?"

"There is," he replied. "Breakfast."

And that's when the fight started...

Back To Her Place

A guy takes his date back to her place. He gets her up to her bedroom where he sees a wall full of fluffy toys.

After he fucks her he asks her: "How was I?"

She says: "Take anything from the bottom shelf."