One night, an 87-year-old woman came home from Bingo to find her 92-year-old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th floor apartment, killing him instantly. Brought before the court on the charge of murder, she was asked if she had anything to say in her own defense.
"Your Honor," she began coolly, "I figured that at 92, if he could screw, he could fly."
Did you hear they came out with a new lesbian shoe?
They're called Dikes. They have an extra long tongue and only take one finger to get off!
Two blondes are talking geography. The first one asks: "Which do you think is further away, Florida or the moon?"
Her pal replies: "Hellooo, can you see Florida from here?"
My wife was curious. She asked: "When do married men stop jerking off?"
I told her: "When they get divorced."
And that's when the fight started...