A laugh a day. It's not hard. Seriously.

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Dick's Joke of the Day

An Age Old Question

Your wife & your lawyer are drowning, so you have to choose. What do you do: go to lunch or catch a movie?

A Simple Plan

What did the dick say to the balls?

You guys hang around here while I go inside.

More Than He Bargained For

Guy walks into a bar carrying a pistol and shouts: "Which one of you assholes slept with my wife?"

A drunk sitting at the end of the bar shouts back: "You ain't got enough bullets buddy."

Moaning And Groaning

My wife and I were basking in the afterglow of having sex when she asked: "Honey, why did God create orgasms?"

I said: "So women can moan even when they’re happy."

And that's when the fight started...

Don't Miss These Jokes!

Too Soon

Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera?

Just when it's getting interesting, they're finished until next time.

Nag Nag Nag

Jake the farmer has an incredibly nagging wife. One day he's out in the field, she brings his lunch to him, and then sits there and berates him while he's eating. Suddenly, the mule kicks up his back legs, smacking her in the head, and it kills her instantly.

At the wake, the minister notices that when a woman offers her sympathy, Jake nods his head up and down, but when a man comes up and speaks to him, he shakes his head from side to side. The minister says to Jake, "Why was it that you nod your head up and down to all the women and shake your head from side to side to all the men?"

Jake says, "The women all say how nice she looks, and how pretty her dress is. The men all say, Is that mule for sale?'"

 

Talent From Top To Bottom

What do you call a guy who can sit on an ice cream cone and tell you the flavor?

A smartass!